The end of the affair
February 1857. The problems with the marriage settlements have created a rift between the Scott Douglas/Kerr and Dunbar families. Charlotte becomes increasingly unhappy and angry at her situation. Eventually she decides to take action.
20th
Awoke very unhappy. Catharine wrote a 3d person note to request Captain Dunbar to discontinue his visits at present. I received a letter from Mr Kerr advising this conduct, & very angry at the things that have been done by the Dunbars.
21st
Recd a letter from Capt: D asking an explanation of C’s note, & enclosing a sheet of paper & envelope with stamps, addressed to himself, entreating me to send that if I could not write more. Could not help feeling rather indignant, as this implies that my Sisters are tyrannizing over me, & that I would send an underhand letter!! I feel my position very difficult & painful. I must write, and so as to show that he places me in a wrong position & cannot think what to say, as a very cool letter goes against the grain. Thought about it too long to send it to night. I see Catharine and Sholta both think badly of the affair, & think I ought not to go on with it.
22d Sunday
Wrote my letter to Captain Dunbar, and sent it by servant. It was a severe one, but I feel so angry at not being allowed any opinion of my own, that I thought it necessary to be very decided.
23d
Received a long and affect: letter in return, but do not feel satisfied with the contents. They are not to the point.
24th
Heard from Mr Kerr; he is going to Edinburgh, to live in the Caledonian Hotel, next door to Sir A & Lady D. Had a long talk with Catharine as to what is to be done, for I must answer something to the last from [Archie]. Do not feel much satisfaction in going on with this, after what has happened, yet cannot make up my mind to break off.
Feb 25th London
Ash-Wednesday – Went to Eaton Chapel with Sholta. Cold and foggy. Mr Rushton read only the Litany & Communication, & Communion Services, & it seemed all very impressive, though I fear my mind was rather distracted and wandering. An excellent sermon. – The Miss Campbells came before lunch. Mr Wms called, according to Catharine’s request, to give his opinion. They had a long talk, and he does not approve of the proceedings of the Dunbars.
26th
I determined at last to break off this affair, after a most terrible uncertainty. In the midst of my meditations a note came from [Archie] offering to concede or rather to try and get his father to concede. I felt though that he might have done this before, unless he believed what he said about “litigation, & paving the way for a separation,” in which case, he should not wish to yield now either. I tried to pray, & hoped I prayed rightly & have been led to a right decision. It was terrible when it came to the point, especially sending back his Photo and locket. Poor Archie! If he cares for me it will have been dreadful. I fancied I saw him in Oxford St very forlorn & sorrowful, looking listlessly in at the shop windows. I pray God that if he is being treated unjustly, it may appear clearly some day, & that we may meet again, & love each other once more; & that I may be pardoned for my cruel conduct.
